H is for Hope

“For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.
He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken.
On God rests my salvation and my glory; my mighty rock, my refuge is God.
Trust in him at all times, O people pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.”
Psalm 62:5-8

“I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come?
My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber
Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The LORD is your keeper; the LORD is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night.
The LORD will keep you from all evil; he will keep your life.
The LORD will keep your going out and your coming in from this time forth and forevermore.”
Psalm 121

“Be glad, O children of Zion, and rejoice in the LORD your God for he has given the early rain for your vindication; he has poured down for you abundant rain, the early and the latter rain, as before.”
Joel 2:23

“Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward him and said of him, “Behold, an Israelite indeed, in whom there is no deceit!” Nathanael said to him, “How do you know me?” Jesus answered him, “Before Philip called you, when you were under the fig tree, I saw you.”
John 1:47-48

I have been writing this blog post for a while, and I think I have figured out now that it won’t ever be done. God is working in my life, so this blog post could go on forever. But it is at the point where I want to post it, so here it goes.

I am learning some things about hope.

Where does hope come from?
Hope comes from the Lord. When I hope in the Lord it means that I am trusting in him and leaning on him to take me through whatever is going on in my life.

When do I hope?
All the time. It is easiest to run to hope as a last resort, but hoping all the time is much better. When I hope in the good times I hope that God get glory through what is happening. When I hope in the hard times I hope God will get me through and that he will help me see why I am going through a hard time.

How do I hope?
I believe and have faith in the plans of the Lord. If I believe that all things are for my joy and the glory of God than I will find hope even when times are hard. If I have faith that Christ will get me through than I have hope.

What if all my hope is gone? Can more hope be cultivated?
If all hope is gone, pray. If you still don’t find hope, pray some more. God listens to prayer. Prayer encourages your heart because it teaches you dependence on the Lord. God can give you more faith and can strengthen your belief, so that you can have more hope. Prayer will help you to feel dependence, dependence will help you to have faith, faith will help you to believe, believing will help you to have faith.

The Psalm writer understands hope very well. He knows it is from the Lord. He knows with hope he cannot be moved. He knows hope in God will keep you going.

The Israelites in Joel have reason to be glad and hope in the Lord for what he has done for them in the past. If you reflect on your life you will see times of the grace of God and you can find hope in those times, so that you will have hope for today.

Jesus knew Nathanael’s heart. Jesus knows your heart. That should do one of two things in your heart. Make you uncomfortable and scared, or bring you hope and joy. If it brings you discomfort than you aren’t truly saved. If it brings you hope than you know that you are a sinner and you are saved by his grace. Jesus knows your heart. He knows when your happy, sad, in pain, rejoicing. He knows your heart.

Hope is a very hard thing to understand and to have. When I think about the times that I have had hope for a different outcome God has always shown himself. I love seeing God work in my life and hope helps me to see that. When I hope for one thing and God shows me another He does it for my good to increase my hope.

My Grandma died on Saturday. We aren’t sure if she died a believer. All we can do is hope and pray. We can hope that God did a work in her heart that we were not aware of. We can hope that at the end of her life she believed in Jesus Christ as her Lord Jesus Christ. We can pray that the Lord had mercy on her. We can’t bring her back. We can’t tell her the gospel now. We can’t do anything. It is the work of the Lord, whether or not she believed. Even though we have hope it doesn’t make it any less painful. She died and she could be suffering now in hell for her sin and unbelief.

How come I have hope, but not joy?
I think sometimes these two come together. When you hope in God it brings you joy to see what he does. When you have joy you are probably more likely to hope. I think sometimes these to things are separate. We might hope when we have no joy. When joy is the last thing on our minds we hope that we will have joy.

God works all things together for his glory and our joy. Even when it is painful to hope, God is working. Even when we are empty of hope, God is working. Even when we are full of hope, God is working. Even when we are empty of joy, God is working. Even when we are full of joy, God is working.

Shouldn’t those words alone bring me hope and joy?
YES! God is working in your life no matter where you are or what situation your in. God is working. That brings me hope. I don’t always sense his working, but I know he is because he promises too. God is good all the time, even when life seems so rough.

Hoping in the name of Jesus,
Greta

Giving Thanks

There are so many things I can write about right now because I haven’t updated in a while, but since it was just Thanksgiving I think I should think about things that I am thankful for so that I can give the Lord praise.

I’m thankful for…

The life and death of Jesus Christ. He lived a perfect life, sinless, so that he could die for those who call on his name. Then he did just that. He died the most painful death so that believers could have life.

The gift of righteousness that has been granted to me. I would have not believed that on my own. God did a work in me so that I would believe in the name of Jesus. Praise God.

The family that I was born into. My family believes in this name so that they influenced me to believe. My parents are married and have been for almost 30 years. That is no small thing. My sisters and brothers all get along pretty well.

The friends I have. I have been taught so much out of the relationships I have with people. God has given me tools that sharpen me so that we can sharpen each other. This is huge, especially for me because I’m so social I need friends to talk too and teach me.

I would like to pause and give a shout out. This is to Annie. Annie sharpens me. No one has taught me what she has. That is a gift. I am so thankful to the Lord for her because I have prayed for much of my life for a friend like her. God has given me this gift. Thank you God. Thank you Annie for allowing God to use you in my life.

The physical needs that are met for me each day. I sleep in a warm bed, I eat good food, I go to a good school. I have all my needs met each and every day.

The country I live in. We are free. Free to vote, free to have a voice, free to disagree. We are free. Our country is unique in that we are free from kings and dictators and always have been. That is a gift.

Praise God for the gifts he has lavished on me. Honestly I don’t know how to say thank you enough. Tears fill my eyes because of all these gifts. I have no other words to say.

Pilgrimage

A couple days ago I wrote this 500some word essay for my humanities class. We were asked to sort of define what the spiritual journey is and defend it. I wanted to put it up on my blog because I feel like it fits:

The spiritual journey is a pilgrimage. It is believers in this world trying to make it through so that we can worship Christ perfectly in the next world. The problem is not everyone knows Christ as his or her Savior and in order to get into that paradise each person must. Our sins separate us from God. God hates sin and he needs to punish it. In His great mercy He sent Jesus Christ to die on the cross for all those who repent and believe on His name as their Savior.

The pilgrimage begins with a confession of your sins and repentance for them. Repentance looks like a turning away from your sin. This means that you were headed down one path and God intervened and stirred something in your heart to see your sin and confess it. You then feel remorse for your sin because it is wrong and it is against God and you turn from it and walk back towards God.

Once you have repented the journey continues. The Holy Spirit is leading you through this journey so that if you ever stumble and fall you will be picked up again. The fact that the Holy Spirit is leading you should start to show in who you are and who you become. You should begin to bear fruits of the Spirit because the Spirit is leading you and you become like those that you follow and hang around with. Fruits of the Spirit are words, actions, deeds that look like characteristics of God. God is love, so when you love others you are producing a fruit of the Spirit. In fact the commandment of the Lord that sums up all other commandments is love others just like you love yourself. Because when you love others you are sacrificing something of yourself for them, just like Christ did for us on the cross. When you have joy you are producing good fruit. The greatest joy comes from the Lord and when you find eternal joy in Him it should spill out onto other people so that they see your joy and want to join you on your pilgrimage. There are several other fruits including: peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. When your life is producing these fruits you are continuing on your spiritual journey. It is important however to understand that these fruits are not what save you. Christ is what saves you and these fruits are a result of that saving grace.

It is also important to understand that on this spiritual journey you will not stop sinning. You are not perfect. You are not God, so you will continue in sin. But it is important to understand that that does not make it okay to sin. But when you sin grace abounds and you are forgiven. When you sin you should feel guilt and remorse and you should repent. Remember these words, “My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent,” (Proverbs 1:10), “My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous” (1 John 2:1).

This is where it ended, but I would like to add more:

It is also important to have other people along side of you on this journey. When other people are with you, working through trials, and celebrating joys, the journey becomes more enjoyable and more worshipful. It is more enjoyable because you have someone to talk to and share problems with. Friends who are believers can sharpen you and point you to the cross when you are not looking in the right places. True believer friends will tell you when you are sinning so that you can repent and continue on the journey. True believer friends will pick you up when you are struggling because they want you to feel loved and to find the grace in each situation. True believer friends will weep with you when something is hard. True believer friends will whoop and hollar when something is good. True believer friends will you lead you to worship. They will show you the grace in their own lives and in your life. Seeing this grace should lead you to worship. They will worship with you in other ways too. Fellowship and friendship are vital to your journey as a believer.

Now, there is much more that I am leaving out, I know, but I think it is more complete. This is the more fun part anyway. I would like to give praises to God for giving me all these things and more in my life. By God’s grace I confess of my sins and He turned around to repentance. By God’s grace I see fruits in my life in many of the activities I do. By God’s grace I see the fruits that I’m strong with and the fruits that I’m weak with, and Lord willing I will get better on both and God will get the glory. By God’s grace I see my sin. I would not be able to see my sin on my own because all I would see is my good deeds and my good fruits. Each day God shows me sin in my life that I need to bring to Him. By God’s grace I have friends. Over the years I have had many friends who point me to Christ. But I had never had one that would bluntly tell me when I’m sinning and be willing to work on it with me. She does not know I’m doing this, but I would like to praise God for Annie. She is so real with me. It is like she knows when I need someone to tell me to stop saying words or thinking thoughts that are sinful. Then she is not afraid to tell me. That is awesome. I mean it in the real sense of awesome. Like I am in awe that God gave me a friend like that. The reason God gives us friends is to do just that. I praise God for Annie and the work that He has done in her life.

I pray that you will pursue friendships that will sharpen you,
Greta

What season is this?

Sorry it's a bad picture, but this is our front yard this morning.

It is so pretty in Minnesota. The first real snowfall happened last night. The snow sticks to the trees and makes them look so pretty. The first snowfall is always very exciting because it is always the prettiest. God’s creation is amazing. The fact that our trees became bare and ugly and then He covered them with snow is just great. Sometime I would like to ask God how He is so creative.

Although this is the first snowfall and it is November the major thought on my brain right now is the summer. Not because I want school to end, but because there are options the Lord is giving me for what I should do to honor Him this summer.

Summer Beach Project is a 6-8 week long training in Myrtle Beach with my church’s college ministry (Campus Outreach). In South Carolina students get jobs, stay in a hotel, and are trained in sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ. This would be an awesome opportunity to develop evangelism skills and see the gospel impact my life in a new way. Both my sisters have done SBP and God used it to develop their walks with Him. Hannah went last year and grew so much from it. I think the idea of being away from home and learning to love the gospel and share it would be awesome.

Another option is to work at camp. I love camp. God used the instrument of camp in my life as a kid. He used it to show me the gospel and to help me grow. The hardest part was coming home, knowing that I wouldn’t be forced to read my Bible at the same time each day. Yet, God was good and He used camp to help me grow into who I am today. I think it would be the sweetest thing in the world to work at a camp for the summer. I think it would be so challenging and tiring. I think God would used the body surrounding me to help me grow. Plus I would be working with kids. I love working with kids and I think that that is something God is calling me to do.

I have really been wrestling with what the Lord is calling me to do next summer. I want to follow His will and not let my own desires or the desires of others get in the way of what I need to do.

This brings up some questions:

What does it look like to seek God’s will?
I think that part of seeking God’s will is asking people what they think. That does not mean doing exactly what they say, but asking them to help you decide the pros and cons of the decision are. I think seeking God’s will is asking myself what my desires are and trying to figure out are those holy desires or just desires because that’s what I want. I think seeking God’s will is praying hard about it. Asking Him to give me ears to hear His will and a heart open to whatever His will is. I think seeking His will is going after the Word.

What does going after the Word look like?
This is also something that I’m working through. How do I go hard after God’s Word? How do I really study His Word? I don’t just want to read the Bible and think it was real good and then just forget everything I read. I want to be able to really absorb something and take away from it. It is especially hard right now because I’m reading in the Old Testament.

Why does God give us the Old Testament?
It is so hard to read. There are names that are way too hard to pronounce and there are way too many of them. It is so long, so why is it so great? Also something I’m working through, but I think God is changing my heart towards the OT. God uses the OT to show His wrath. People in the OT sin, are punished, change their ways, sin, are punished, change their ways, over and over and over again. It is the same thing, but I think the punishment is what I want to say something about. God hates sin. This does not mean hate like 5th grade I hate you type of hate. It is a despising, must get rid of this because it’s disgusting hate. He punishes sin very explicitly both in the OT and the NT. It is important to see that God is a wrathful God. He is not just love and kisses all the time. In order to be perfectly loving He must be perfectly just, angry, and wrathful. He needs to get rid of the sin that so opposes Him. In punishing the OT people He shows them love. In Christ dying on the cross He shows us love. This is awesome.

How do I study this?
Pray. Pray. Pray. It is way too hard to read the Bible without prayer. How will I get anything out of 2 Chronicles without the Lord giving me eyes to see? To any non-believer the OT will look boring and like a lot of names. To many believers the OT is long, boring, and has a lot of names. But when God gives us eyes to see it becomes clear that the names matter. The kings matter. The people matter. The punishment matters.

I’m not saying I got this down at all. But, I think with God’s help I can go after the OT, go after His will, and grow deeper in love with the cross. I just don’t want to be like so many of the rulers in 2 Chronicles who don’t do the Lord’s will, turn away from Him, sin against Him, and then die. Which maybe God is using the OT to show me that. I don’t know.

Seeking God’s will,
Greta

WHY GRETA?

This is a guest post by Annie Vavra. I am sick and it's all Greta's fault. Why do I still hang around her? Beats me! Actually, Greta and I have known of each other for a long time but finally connected this year when we had American Sign Language together. I have been realizing that God puts different people in our lives at different times and it's all for a specific reason or reasons. In the last couple years I have really been blessed with the friends that are in my life. I have made so many deep connections and I feel like it has really helped me. It allows me to have certain friends that understand and help me with all the different branches of my life. But, I would like to specifically talk about the timing and purpose of Greta in my life. I feel like Greta has been specifically placed in my life, by God, because she adds something to what I already know. I worked at a camp all summer and it really challanged my faith and allowed my relationship with God to grow. I love the challange and one of my worries after I left camp was that I would fall into the same place I was before I went to camp. I thought I would grow distant from God and that I would lose my accountability. Then I met Greta. She is someone that I really trust and feel I can share my thoughts with. I really enjoy discussing things with her, whether it's just some small topic or something that I really, deeply care about. I feel very comfortable talking to her about things that relate to my beliefs and Christianity in general. Lately, I have been discussing things regarding my Christian Theology class with her. I think these discussions really help me understand what I believe and help me discover more and more who I am in Christ, my purpose. I also feel like God put Greta in my life to give me someone who isn't scared to challange me, to give me someone that I feel is stable and has a lot of experience and wisdom in life. I love that I can talk with Greta about anything and not have to worry about being the strong one. I think we both carry equal weight of our friendship, where as in most of my other friendships I feel like I have to be the strong one, the one that everyone else leans on. It really ways my down but when I'm with Greta, I get the energy to stay strong. Anyways I feel like I have really just been blabbing about I don't even know. I am trying this blogging deal because Greta said that it is easy, but I told her I'm not very good at writing. Any hoo, all I really wanted to say by all of this is that God have purpose for everyone that is involved in our lives and until we take the time to sit down and really thing about it, we don't fully understand all that we have. So, I would like to close in saying that I am very happy to have Greta in my life, love the girl and I thank God for her everyday.

Through randomness we will see God's purposes and plans for us,
Annie

Greta here. I promised Annie I wouldn’t read her portion of this post until I actually posted it on the internet, but I do know a little of what she wrote. I know the title is “Why Greta?” and I’m pretty sure she tried to answer that question. So in light of her question I will ask, why Annie?

History:
My parents and Annie’s parents graduated with one another from Cambridge High School. Our families have been friends our whole lives. We did not become friends until a few weeks ago. We discovered we knew one another in our first ASL class together and the rest is history.

After a couple of times of seeing each other around campus we started chatting on facebook and then texting. Soon we were very good friends.

Who:
Annie and I are very similar. After spending some time with one another we discovered we are rather scary similar. We have the same opinions, same likes and dislikes, same ideas, same hobbies, same pleasures, same God. All of these things combine to form a super amount of commonalities, but we have one major difference. She likes science. She is a science major and she loves the facts. I am not too good with facts and I don’t particularly enjoy science, especially blood. This difference is so great because it helps us to be even better friends.

She claims she is no good at writing and that since that is my stronger suit we get along great. This may be true, but I wanted her to explore her writing abilities, so I asked her to post on my blog. I told her to write what she wanted. But, she said she needed to discuss it first. I love discussing things because it means talking and hanging out which are my two favorite things to do.

True story:
I cut my finger recently. I didn’t think anything of it. Probably because I didn’t look at it to make sure it was okay. I don’t like blood or flappy skin. I covered it with a band-aid and moved on. Annie checked it out and strongly suggested that I get stitches. I couldn’t believe it. So she gladly took me to the doctor where they put stitches on and told me to stop cutting my fingers and that it was a good thing I had such good moral support. Annie thought it was the most entertaining thing ever to see them put stitches in me and make fun of me for cutting myself with an X-Acto knife.

Why?
She makes me think. She asks questions that other people won’t ask because she cares. She helps me to see the smart and the dumb in many situations. She’s like another brain for my busy mind.

She makes me question. She helps me to question what I believe so that I make it my own. We discuss deep stuff because that is how we both grow and we question one another because only most the time do we agree.

She makes me feel convicted . She is one of the most humble people I know. She opens up her heart for people and lets them in because she genuinely cares. She is so real and she lets me be real with her. This genuine realness convicts me that I’m not always this way and it shows me where I could improve. It is such a grace. She was with me when my mom told me I should sleep. I tried so hard to pull her into my sin, but the Lord granted her grace to stay out to show me some more stuff.

She is wise. She gives me advice when I need it. She gave me wise counsel when I was sinning against my mom and God has used her for that purpose and many more.

She prays. If ever I ask her to pray for me, she says something along the lines of, “Of course. Anytime. I would do anything for you.” I strongly believe that when I do ask her to pray she does pray. I love that comfort in being prayed for.

She makes me laugh. We have a very similar sense of humor and her remarks are always witty and exciting. I’d like to think that I’m becoming more witty by spending time with her.

She’s silly. We laugh together all the time. In fact we probably mostly laugh together. Her laugh is so great because it is hearty and weezy and it makes me laugh harder when she is laughing hard. Her eyes get all squinty and she can’t hardly breath, but I just laugh at her more because she is close to tears.

She likes playing games. We are both highly competitive so it makes it very fun to play games and beat on one another.

She likes hanging out with me. This one makes me really happy because I love hanging out with her too. It doesn’t matter to us if were just doing homework, we just like to hang out.

She likes to be cozy. I love being cozy because it is so fun to be warm and cuddly, and Annie likes it too.

She’s good at listening. If I talk she listens. And then she responds in a respectful loving way.

She takes care of me. Regarding both the stitches and many other things including, whenever we watch movies she covers my eyes when scary or bad parts come up.


Why not?
God has given me a great friend. I praise Him for His awesome grace in this relationship. Why wouldn’t I take joy in being friends with Annie. And now I’m so proud of her for writing on my blog. I know she can write and I’m glad she’s my friend.

I encourage you to choose someone you love and figure out why it is you love them. It is very cool to look at all the reasons and in the end I am confident you will praise God. I love Annie even more now because I see the grace in her life and the grace in our friendship. God gives us fellowship and friends for a reason. That reason being to spur one another on and to love one another like Christ loved us. Take advantage of fellowship and friendship. Give in fellowship and friendship.

Praising God for my awesome friend,
Greta

In and out of The Word

I didn’t get in the Word last week as much as I usually do. I can totally tell. My heart was much more willing to sin last night because it had not been impacted by God’s Word enough last week. Instead of doing devos last week I would excuse myself because I was too tired. This was a big mistake. Even when I’m just reading the Old Testement (which is what I’m doing now) the Lord is feeding me. If I don’t get my daily dose of seeing his grace and mercy and justice in the OT then I don’t see those things in my life.
Last night I was planning on going to Vespars and then hanging out with friends. My mom came in my room and told me I couldn’t do either of those things because I sounded sick. I couldn’t believe it. I told her that I had lost my voice and that I was getting over being sick so I would be fine. I would be fine with going to Vespars and hanging out. She said that that was not a good idea. So with much anger and anguish I obeyed. As I sat in my bed trying to figure out why my mom wouldn’t let me go God showed me some major sin in my life.
The lack of Bible reading in my life caused me to be much more willing to be angry with my mom and not care. You have to understand I hate being angry with my mom. She is like my best friend. I tell her everything and if I’m mad at her than I won’t talk to her.
I tried so hard to figure out the good in this terrible situation. The terrible situation being that I couldn’t be with my friends. I was so angry. I sat in my bed asking the Lord to forgive me for my ridiculous anger at my mom. She was worried about my health; she didn’t hate me and my friends and want me to stay because of that. She wants me to be better so I can hang out. What an awesome mercy that is, but I did not se it that way. I prayed the Lord would help me see it that way.
I still had one chapter left to read in one of my assignments, so I asked the Lord to use what I was about to read to convict me. Just to let you know if you pray something like that God is going to answer yes because he wants you to see your sin and his mercy. I was reading The Confessions by St. Augustine. This guy is the most humble guy in the world. He spills his whole life to the whole world in a confession to God of the work that He did and the mercy in his life. He confesses disgusting sin, and I wanted God to use that somehow to convict me. He did.
Qualifiers for you to understand this:
• Lost voice…couldn’t talk good
• Anger at mom for keeping me home
• Hadn’t read the Bible enough in the last week
I believe God used the following quotes to show me my sins and lead me to confession last night:

“It happened by coincidence that in that same summer my lungs had begun to fail under the severe strain of teaching, making it difficult for me to draw breath and giving proof of their unhealthy condition by pains in my chest. My tone was husky and I could not manage any sustained vocal effort. These symptoms had worried me when they first appeared because they were forcing upon me the necessity of either giving up my professional career or, if there was any prospect of my being cured and recovering strength, at least of taking some rest.”

“Then I read, Let your anger deter you from sin, and how those words moved me, my God! I had already learned to feel for my past sins an anger with myself that would hold me back from sinning again. With good reason had I learned this anger, since it was no alien nature from a tribe of darkness that had been sinning through me, as they maintain who, though not angry with themselves, are accumulating a fund of anger that will overwhelm them on the day of anger, the day when your righteous judgment is to be revealed.”

“But by adding to that modest allowance daily modest allowances—for one who allows himself license in little things is ruined little by little—she had fallen at length into the habit of avidly quaffing near goblets of wine.”

He couldn’t talk so he rested. I couldn’t talk so my mom told me to rest. His anger was holy anger toward his sin. My anger was not holy anger and it was not preventing me from sinning, but in fact it was causing me to sin more. He told of story of a girl allowing herself to drink a little wine and then becoming a drunkard. I allowed myself time away from the Bible and then became okay with sinning.
God is rich in mercy. Even when I was doing homework he used it for his glory and my humility. I repented for my anger towards my mom. He revealed the good in this terrible situation. Mom wants me to be healthy, I needed to get in the Word, I needed to be convicted for my sins. God is good all the time.

Developing Holy anger at my sin,
Greta

Facebook: A great friend, An even greater Enemy

I hate Facebook...
Wait, I mean, I love Facebook.

Oh goodness it is a war within me. Too often I find myself on Facebook when I should be doing much more productive things. It is so frustrating because I know if I just shutdown facebook I would get done so much faster, but I love learning about people, looking at pictures, and chatting. It is so fun. And it is such a waste of time. How do I fight this evil enemy? I don't have wireless internet at home so there is no way I can go on the internet while I'm in my bedroom doing homework. It is great. Bless my parents for not falling into our begging trap of, "Please can we get wireless, life is so much better that way." But, when I'm at school I can get internet anywhere and I almost always have my computer with me. In order to defeat this distraction I promise myself I won't take out my computer, or I ask friends to make sure I don't take out my computer. It is very helpful. This morning I got to school early and on my way I said I wouldn't take out my computer until I was done reading one of the books for one of my classes. Since I didn't take it out it only took 40 minutes to finish. Which really feels amazing cause now I'm done with that.

Enough about facebook, let me tell you about God's movement in my life...

God has used the car accident a couple of weeks ago for my good. He used it to test my faith in Him, to show that even (especially) when stuff goes wrong there is a need to trust Him. If I trust Him than my prayers to Him seem very worthwhile.

Prayer has also been huge. I use prayer more throughout my day than I have ever before. I find myself silently praying while I'm talking to someone so that they feel more loved and cared for. I find myself trusting that God will answer prayers and then seeing Him answer them. When I don't have words to say I pray He will provide answers and words.

God has given me close friends who love the Lord. This is awesome and very encouraging. When I get to talk to friends about Jesus I get so excited and I love Jesus more and I love my friends more. This has been an awesome experience.

I wake up each morning and read my Bible and although it is a habit God has been moving so that I do it willingly and joyfully each morning. It's hard to read names in 1 Chronicles, but with God's help I see a couple words that draw me to pray each day. God did awesome things with those names in Bible times, so He can still do awesome things with those names today.

John Piper is preaching on the gospel of John right now and I'm amazed at how much God is using him to help me love the gospels more. I can't wait to be done reading the Old Testement so that I can read Luke and John explicitly.

I'm fighting many sins. One sin is idolizing people. Too often I put friends first because I love being with them. This means that I spend more time thinking about and spendinng time with friends than I do with the Lord. I find myself making having friends be God. This is really hard for me becuase I love friends and I think friends are vital to my growth, but I have to be careful no to make them my idols. At a school like Bethel it is very easy to make myself an idol too. Too often I find I'm comparing my sin to other people's sin and making myself better than them, I'm idolizing myself. I need to constantly remind myself of the truth of the gospel and know that I did not deserve Christ one bit. I deserved eternal damnation in hell and God's justice and grace prevailed in giving me eternal life! This is so awesome and humbling. The humility is what I need to bring with me each day as I walk around campus, go to class, and spend time with friends. Christ was humble in His sacrifice I must be humble to show the weight and joy of His sacrifice.

In the humility and joy of Christ,
Greta

Where do I find joy?

Oh the pain of accidents,

Where do I find joy?

Except from the One above.

There is pain in losing,

Whether in death

Or in un-response

And there is joy in gaining.

No lives lost,

Some lives gained.

By the grace of God

These hurt teens will

Bring others to the joy

Of the King.

Oh the pain of accidents,

Where do I find joy?

In the King of Glory,

Let Him come in,

Let Him bring joy,

To those who do not know.

He suffered for our sins,

He knows what it is,

To be in pain,

He knows what it is,

To feel all alone,

He knows what it is,

To ask why?

Oh the pain of accidents,

Where do I find joy?

He asked, “Why me?

Why now? Please remove

This cup from me

I pray, but if not, let

The Father’s will be done.”

Remove this pain for these

Families, but if not, let

The Father’s will be done.

We ask you to bear this burden,

It is too hard to carry,

You promised you would.

Oh the pain of accidents,

Where do I find joy?

You promised not to give

Us too much and leave

Us hanging, help us to see

Your hand in all this.

Give the Lee’s hope that

They will one day again see

Sarah the happy girls she is

Give hope to Adam’s family

That he will be strong tomorrow

Just like he was yesterday.

Give them joy amidst their pain.

Oh the pain of accidents,

Where do I find joy?

Nowhere, except in the

Name of Jesus, who came

To suffer for me and

With me and bore my sin

On the cross. What a

Grace it is to have a king

Who did that for my

Eternal joy. Give this joy to

The families and to the

Other driver. May they be

Blessed to find joy

In the pain of accidents.

God's amazing miracles

I don't know if I ever mentioned this but 4 kids from my church were in a car accident on Sunday. One (Bill) walked away fine except for emotionally. Another (Alyssa) walked away with a broken collar bone and hurt very emotionally. Another (Adam) had/has internal bleeding, broken ribs, punctured lung, ruptured spleen, torn kidney, and pelvis broken in 4 spots and is going into surgery tomorrow. And another (Sarah) had severe head trauma, the doctors said she shouldn't have made it but she is still alive because of God's amazing miracles. I visited the hospital today. I didn't get to see Adam, but he is slowly progressing. Sarah is in a drug-induced coma. My mom and I got to pray with Sarah's family. I got to hold her hand. It was probably one of the hardest things I've ever done. We also got to pray with Adam's sister Kate. She and I are very good friends. She is a major blessing to me. It was also one of the hardest things I've done to hold her and pray with her. She loves the Lord and wants Him to be glorified even in Adam's pain. I praise God for that. God is working miracles in their bodies. It was amazing. I wrote notes to Adam, Kate, and Sarah on their caringbridge websites. I'd like to share them with you...

Sarah,
I got to come see you today. I got to pray with your family. It was such a blessing to recount all the gifts God has given me and you through His son. God is sovereign in all He does even in the pain that he causes. I pray He continues to heal you. I pray He continues to work in your heart even while you are not fully awake. I pray He lets you finish the work that He has put you on this earth to do. You are a blessing. You are always smiling and gracious even when people aren't toward you. That is an awesome quality. God is good all the time.
I'm praying for you,
Greta Johnson

Adam,
I pray you know the Lord as your Savior.
I pray you grow from this.
I pray that you glorify the Lord through this.
I pray you love the Lord more from this.
I pray you love your family more from this.
I pray you see the great gifts you have been given.
I pray that you find hope in the perfect heavenly physician.
I pray you know that Christ suffered as you suffer.
I pray you tell others of the great work that Christ has done for you and for them.
I pray you feel stilled as if by quiet waters.

I'm praying for you, hey can you give your sister a message for me?

Dear Kate,

I love you. When I learned of this accident I started to cry and pray immediately. My first prayer was that all the kids in the car would know Christ as their Savior so that if God decided to call them home they would be in heaven that day worshipping the Lord perfectly and in joy. My second prayer was that you would grow out of this experience. I prayed that you would know Christ as your Savior so that you could find reason to glorify Him in pain. I prayed that you would not be angry with God for His sovereignty in letting this accident occur. That you would see that what He did is for your joy in Him even though it caused immense pain. I prayed that you would know that He did this to show you that He provides only what we can handle and nothing more. I prayed that you would find hope in each morning because His mercies are new every morning. I want you to know that I’ve been praying for you. I want you to know that I care about you and your spiritual well being. I want you to know God is sovereign in all things good and bad. I want you to love Christ more through this pain.

I love you so much in all the world,
Greta

P.S. Thanks Adam because Christ is using you.

Please be praying that God continues to work in their bodies and in their hearts to the glory of His name,
Greta

What does it mean to be in joy even when in pain?

This is a rambling. I don't know how to say what I'm trying to say. Sorry.

I am so totally selfish. I can't do anything for the glory of God without God's help. So when I'm in pain or when my friends are in pain how do I comfort them and bring them joy to the glory of God. I was just invited to a facebook group to pray for some friends who were in a car accident today. All of them are in pretty bad condition. I learned of the accident through the group. First of all, not a good way to learn. Second of all, I started to shake and cry. Immediately I wanted to try to comfort their families, but I didn't know what to say or how to say it. I just prayed. I prayed that those who were in the accident would know Christ as their Lord and Saviour so if it is the Lord's will to take them they will have eternal joy perfectly worshipping Christ in heaven. I prayed that if it was the Lord's will they would be healed from their injuries. I prayed that the families would praise God rather than curse God for His providence in this accident. But then I started to think how do I not just pray this and be this for these families. How do I be joy in their pain? I think the best way to do it is to just proclaim the gospel.

I don't know how speaking the gospel to the families will be helpful but I have hope that it would. One time my Dad said that in every situation sharing the gospel is helpful and of first importance to change hearts to praise God rather than curse Him.

The Lord doesn't will anything to happen to us that we can't handle. This is for sure going to seem like more than these families can handle. But if they have hope in the Lord he will provide ways to make it through. If they hope in the Lord That their family members are trusting in the Lord it will bring joy rather than pain. Don't get me wrong death causes pain for those left, but what a hope it brings because the person who has died was given eternal life in heaven if they are trusting in the Lord. How awesome is that?

If you have ideas of how to be joyful even when you are in pain, please tell me. I want to brink hope and joy to my friends because they are precious to the Lord.

Searching for joy,
Greta

Major League

Hey it's October. Which is reason to write a post.

I'm really in the groove of school now. It's nice to feel like I fit in for the first time in my life.

My sister is home for the weekend, which is super exciting. I love her. She is one of the smartest people I know. She is also one of the most passionate people of Christ. She wants to spread the gospel because she loves Jesus so much. One day I hope to be passionate about spreading the gospel like she is.

I really like CO and feel like God will use it in my life.

I'm beginning to think about what I will do this summer.

God gives me grace each day because he provides friends, mentors, and family that teach me how to love the Bible more.

A while a go I said that Lord-willing I will major in Youth Ministry. A couple weeks ago I was talking to my mom and sister and Emily said, "Don't major in youth ministry; that's stupid." I was taken aback and I didn't know what to say. She asked me what I could do with a youth ministry major. Honestly, I don't know, all I know is that I wanna work with students and youth ministry is a good way to do that. Than I started thinking about it, I don't wanna just WORK with students I wanna be relational, that's what I like to do. So today I was looking around the Bethel website and saw a major called, "Communications Studies: Relational Studies Emphasis." I think that is so cool. Just what I would want. But I still I wanna work in Youth Ministry, so maybe a double major? Whatever the Lord wills.

All in all life is good and God is better,
Greta

Woo[t] and other thoughts

I want to write a blog post today. I woke up early this morning to finish my schoolwork so that I could blog during this time. I feel like I haven't written in a very long time. The problem is I don't know what to write about. So many confusing things have happened to me that I feel like I'm overflowing with stuff to say, but I don't know what to say about them.

This morning I read an e-mail with this verse:
2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 says, "May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word."

It was written just like that. With all the stuff bolded and underlined. I wonder why God had this person write like that. I think it was because this is something He wanted to catch my eye and want to write about.

Loved- it's underlined probably because this person feels loved by God first, while I was still a sinner, while I would rather ignore all that He has done.

Eternal encouragement- is underlined probably because the person who sent this is my R.I.O.T. leader (Bethel Bible study, I don't know what it stands for), and she wanted to feel God's encouragement this week in our busy schedules.

Encourage- is bolded probably because God wants my heart to be encouraged- more to come on this

Strengthen- is bolded probably because God wants to strengthen me- again more to come on this

I think this person missed one major thing, "by his grace" God did this not because we deserved it but because it was by his grace.

Woo- Winning Others Over- I took a strengths finder test this week for a class and this was my biggest strength. It means I am not afraid to talk to strangers and try to make a connection with them so that they will feel loved. Sometimes I'm sure it is perceived as me wanting more friends. It probably is that way sometimes. I really like to feel loved and when I'm not looking for it from Christ I'm looking for it in people. I'm looking to be filled, energized, appreciated by people. I really agree that this is my biggest strength. I feel like if this wasn't a strength I wouldn't know people that I know. The only problem is that it is a weakness. It is a pride weakness that the Lord has permitted me to recognize. It is a not depending only on the Lord weakness that the Lord has permitted me to recognize. It is a weakness that I need to work on by his grace. At the same time it is strength that I love having and need to start using to the glory of God.

At the beginning I said that confusing things have happened to me. That isn't true. God things have happened to me. He has shown me my sin and my need for prayer.
-I've been giving a lot lately in my friendships at school and at WyldLife. I feel like the cup that should be overflowing is starting to run dry because of the energy I'm putting into relationships.
-I'm trying to fill my own cup. I'm trying by the Bible I'm reading, the prayer I'm saying, and the people I'm being with to fill my own cup with God stuff. I'm failing. I need to rely on God. He showed me that grace.
-I need to recognize the freedom in God's grace. His Son died on the cross for me so I don't need to do works to earn my righteousness. I needed Him to die and to plan works for me to do in His name and now I need to follow Him and He will lead me.
-I can't give my whole heart, life, actions, words, deeds, misdeeds to Jesus without the grace of God.
-Warning: This may sound very prideful and self-centered. If people should fail at loving me I need to be okay. I shouldn't look for love in people but in God because His love never fails.

These are the things God has been teaching me. Pray that I will work through them and that I will wholly lean on Jesus name. And I will pray the same for you.

Give me grace God. Let me see your grace God.
In Jesus name,
Greta

Why Lord-willing

As often as I can (and I fail to remember most times) I try to qualify future events with saying Lord-willing. During the first couple weeks of school the question was: What is your major? My response would usually be, "Lord-willing it will be youth ministry." Sometimes I would be given strange looks of, "what the heck is that supposed to mean?" other times I would see, "hmm, that is interesting."

I've decided to make an effort to qualify the future with Lord-willing so that others will know that it doesn't matter how hard I try, if the Lord doesn't want me to do something or see someone than it won't happen.

And if you say this to non-believers than they might ask questions. It could be good for witnessing.

Lord-willing, I'll write again,
Greta

Wrestling with Worship

I really like Bethel.

Going into this year I said to myself that I'd keep my mind open to going to a different school next year. I am not doing a very good job. I really want to stay at Bethel because I am loving the life. I'm loving what God is doing in me and what He has provided for me. But I don't want to get so comfortable that I am not open to going somewhere else.

Reasons not to apply other places...
1/ I am already accepted to Bethel
2/ I like it here
3/ It's close to home
4/ I would miss it if I went somewhere else
5/ WyldLife
6/ Campus Outreach
7/ Friends from church
8/ Friends from school

Reasons to apply other places...
1/ It's close to home
2/ New experiences
3/ See if I can go anywhere else

Oh boy, so many decisions for a young person. I think I'm beginning to understand what my senior friends were going through this last spring.

We were singing in chapel recently and something hit me. Then I was listening to a Mark Driscoll sermon and it hit me again. We were singing about surrendering all I have to Jesus Christ. I kept thinking about that and wondered what it would look like in regards to school. Then I listened to Mark Driscoll talk about how worship isn't just singing, it's giving all thoughts, actions, and things over to Christ. He said that when people have problems they aren't drinking, swearing, eating, sex, etc. problems they are worship problems. We are putting something ahead of Jesus Christ and worshiping that thing rather than Christ. I'm praying that I can surrender myself over to Christ in a new way so that I'm not worshiping Bethel.

Do I wanna stay at Bethel because I've made it my God and it's what I want?

Yes, I think so. I need to surrender my desires and needs to God to see where He will have me.

Surrendering all,
Greta

King of Kings

Today in chapel President Jay Barnes spoke about Christ followers. One of the core values of Bethel is that it is full of Christ followers. After he spoke he showed a video of a sermon by Reverand S.M. Lockridge. He proclaims all of these truths about Jesus being king and than he asks, "That's my King. I wonder do you know Him?"

That's a question that I want to ask myself sometimes. Do I know Him or do I just know Him. Do I know Him with my heart or is it just in my head. There are times when I feel the spirit moving and I know Him, but there are times when my spirtual life is stagnant and I feel like I don't know Him. The truth isn't that I don't know Him at those times it's that I judge my knowing Him by my feelings. I know I've talked about this before, but here I go again. It is obviously a struggle if I do it more than once.

I have a schedule now. I wake up and I read my Bible and ten keep going on in my day. Each day I wake up and I pray that the Lord will give me eyes to see Christ in the Old Testement and that I will glean something from it. In other words I pray that I will know Him. Often times I don't know Him.

Give me Jesus. Let me know the King.

Yearning for Him,
Greta

Smorgasbord

Smor-gas-bord n. a meal served buffet style, consisting of a large variety of hot or cold dishes; a restaurant featuring a smorgasbord; a wide variety.

This is a variety of random thoughts based on a wonderful weekend.

I love camp. I just had an awesome weekend. I don’t mean awesome the way the world thinks of it. I mean awesome as in I saw God in awesome ways. I was at a leadership training retreat for YoungLife volunteers. It was great. We had times of worship, teaching and fellowshipping.

The worship was great because it was just a guitar and our voices. We filled the room with our voices in worship to the Lord. I felt drawn to Lord in worship.

Our speaker was a man named Bill Paige. He has a really cool life story and he shared of the work that the Lord has done in his life. He applied it to going out and doing YoungLife and WyldLife in schools.

For those who don’t know YoungLife is a mission to win the right to be heard by students by going to where they are. In winning that right we are able to share the gospel and help nurture new faith.

Bill talked about how broken kids, poor kids, white kids, black kids, rich kids, smart kids, stupid kids and all kids need to hear the gospel and when we share that we give them new hope and the opportunity to have new life. He said that if he had been shared the gospel as a kid his life would be different.

He challenged us and said that we can’t talk about Jesus without cultivating a relationship with Him. One of the talks that really hit me was on forgiveness. God used Bill to convict me of the need to forgive some people and the need to be forgiven by others. He said that forgiving and being forgiven are keys to being spiritually healthy. God used that talk to show me that I’m holding onto some anger. He used it to help me start praying that I can forgive so that I can draw closer to Him.

We had great times as a team. We sat and got ready to go to the schools this fall and it was really encouraging to set goals for the school year.

Tonight I went to Vespers. It is a worship service at Bethel. I went twice. The worship was awesome. God was glorified and used it again to show me how prideful I am. I can’t wait for the day when I will be able to worship God without sin. I can’t even make it through a whole service without sinning against God.

One of the songs at Vespers said something about giving it all to God and humbly bowing before Him. I started thinking about that. I need to pray so often that I will give my all to God. Not only that but when I do that I need to do it without being proud. And I need to show that it was not me that did it but Him. Something to be praying about.

I want to encourage you to seek out what God is doing in your heart. Is He convicting you of sin? Does He want you to give Him your all? Do you need to forgive someone?

These are all questions that I’m wrestling.

Psalm 46:10
Be still and know that I am God
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!

Be still, listen, ask questions, listen, be still and do it all again.

Praying for stillness,
Greta

Homework

I feel like I'm doing pretty good at college. I've done a pretty good job at keeping ahead of my homework schedule. I just finished up doing some Economics homework and I already feel like I've learned a lot. But that is not the purpose of this post. The purpose of this post is to say...

The Lord has taught me a lot of new things this week. I've been asking people to pray that I will get in the swing of things and read my Bible regularly. I normally read at night but because I know I get home late I've decided to change it up. The Lord has worked on me and been getting me up early enough to read the Word and pray before I leave for school each day. It is probably one of the hardest things ever because I'm so tired when I open up my Bible. But, it has been so fruitful. The last couple of weeks I've been in 2 Samuel. I've seen King David be a total jerk and sin against God so many times. Yet, God calls Him a man after His own heart. In that I see grace and mercy. In that I see that I'm a the biggest jerk and sinner against God all the time, yet He forgives me and calls me His own. It is such an awesome thing that He would do that. I didn't do anything to deserve it and in fact I deserve death. So, He gives me this grace now for my sin.

He gives me His grace each morning as I open the Word.
He gives me His grace each day as I do schoolwork.

Hebrews 3:12-13
Take care brothers, lest their be in any of you an evil unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. Exort one another everyday as long as it is called "today" that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.

He gives me grace in those that exort me everyday.

Here I go to do Sign Language homework in His grace,
Greta

Today's the Day

Classes start today. I only had one and it was canceled because of a special chapel. I went to school and hung out and went to chapel. It was a good day. I praise God because he has given me much grace. I was so nervous that I wouldn't make friends and that I'd be lonely. But God had a different plan. I have a core group of friends now and that is awesome. I now have friends that I can call or text to say, "let's hang out." That is really nice because now I won't be scared to just be sitting around campus.

I just had a thought pop in my mind...

My two favorite words in the Bible are "but God." No matter what follows after that phrase it is awesome. But God saved us. But God gives us grace. That's great.

Anyway...

So far school is good. I had an assignment due this morning even though I haven't gone to a class, that's cool I guess because that is college-y. I'm feeling really encouraged because I know many people are praying for me and that is why it is going so well. I love prayer and so whenever I look in my phone for someone to call/text I start to pray for them, and then let them know because it is so encouraging to know that someone is praying for you. It's like saying that you aren't good enough to encourage them but since God is involved it's infinitely better and infinitely more encouraging and it feels so good.

This is an encouragement to pray because God answers prayers in every way.

Praying with you for more grace,
Greta

School Shmool

Post two of two for the day. Unless of course I go again. Which, I don't think will happen.

Welcome Week starts today. I'm super excited because I'm going to be at a new school with different people. The Lord blessed me this way. Let me share with you why this was such a blessing.

On Tuesday I went to Irondale (my high school) for a meeting. I pulled into the parking lot and I started to sweat, my heart started to pound, and I was really nervous. I sat there in my car for a couple minutes asking the Lord to give me strength to go inside. I'm not scared of the building. I'm scared of the memories I have there. Not all of them were caused by other people hurting me. Some were caused by me failing to take an opportunity to share the gospel with friends. This really pains me. The fact that I was too prideful to ever take the time and share with my friends the good news of Christ hurts me and it hurts them. The fact that I didn't call any of my school friends all summer and try to take advantage of having time to share, hurts me and it hurts them. I've also been hurt by people at school and I'm very excited to start a new experience at a new school. Although I will be at Bethel I know not all the students will be believers. I pray the Lord will give me strength and humility to open my mouth and proclaim Jesus name.

Well I walked into Irondale and the memories kept coming but I looked around and didn't see any signs for the meeting. So I called my mom and asked her if we got the date wrong, she didn't know. I went home and looked it up and sure enough the meeting wasn't until Wednesday. I didn't understand why God made me do that. Why he made me go through all that pain and be wrong about the meeting. I sat in my room and tears rolled down my face. It was good tears. It was God tears. I was crying because the Lord was showing me my sin. And He was showing me His blessing of a new school. He's giving me a chance now to watch for my sin and attack it at a new school. I just wonder if I were at Irondale would I watch and attack my sin there? And I think the answer is yes. Because the Lord has worked many things in my life this summer and He's given my strength.

I'm excited for this new blessing.

I've read many blogs the last few weeks about how summer is/has come to a close. I don't want mine to close because it went too fast. And because school shmool. But, the Lord has a plan for each life that is going back to school, and I pray my friends will see God's grace and plan in this new school year.

Friends- you know who you are- I love you. The Lord bless you and keep you.

Working hard at school (maybe),
Greta

Grandma ShuShu

I might blog a couple times today because this is an important week. Here is blog one of possible two.

We celebrated my grandma's 80th birthday yesterday night. Today is the actual day. All her kids, grand-kids, grand-kids in-law, and future grand-kids in-law wrote something to her. Here is what I wrote:

Dear Grandma,

Others would say that theirs is greater.
They would be wrong.
Mine cleans the dishes because,
That’s what her grandma did.

Others would say that theirs is younger.
They would be wrong.
Mine still goes places,
Like she is forty.

Others would say that theirs is sweeter.
They would be wrong.
Mine loves talking about all,
Of her grandkids and their greatness.

Others would say that theirs is nicer.
They would be wrong.
Mine wonders how I am,
What I’m doing and where I’m going.

Others would say that theirs is funnier.
They would be wrong.
Mine says funny things like,
“If you put ice-cream and root beer together it tastes really good.”

Others would say that theirs cooks better.
They would be wrong.
Mine makes cheese potatoes,
And scrambled eggs like no ones business.

Others would say theirs takes them places.
They would be wrong.
Mine goes with me,
Wherever we go so that she can see us perform.

Others would say theirs is prettier.
They would be wrong.
Mine has silver hair,
And little feet that make her beautiful.

Others would say theirs cares more.
They would be wrong.
Mine cares about my life in Jesus,
Which is of prime importance.


Others would say theirs is awesomer.
They would be wrong.
Because mine loves Jesus,
Worships Jesus and is in awe of His love.

Others would say theirs is sixty.
They would be right.
But mine is eighty,
And oh so much wiser.


Grandma I love you for all of these things and more. Happy Birthday! I pray that the Lord give you many more. You bless me more than you know.

Love,
Greta Joy

This night again reminded me of the brevity of life. Many tears of joy and sorrow were cried because of the good and the bad we talked about. It reminded me of James 4:13-15:

Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go into
such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and
make a profit"-- yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring.
What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little
time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, "If the Lord
wills, we will live and do this or that."

We are just a mist even if we live 80 years. Live your life for Christ now so that if your mist disappears tomorrow you won't be left empty. My grandma does live for Christ and that was emphasized many times last night. Love you grandma!

Striving to live for Christ,
Greta

My Mom has Jeri

Mom and Jeri

Me and mom

Ever since I can remember my mom has had Jeri. Jeri is her best friend. They write letters to each other and they talk on the phone every couple of weeks. Jeri used to live here in Minnesota, but then her husband was transferred to Houston, Texas. That was probably eleven years ago. Jeri has two biological sons and two adopted daughters. I have two biological sisters and two adopted brothers. They met when the Privet's adopted Anna and the Johnson's adopted Spencer, about 15 years ago. Ever since then they've shared in their toils and joys of parenting. Spencer and Anna are half-siblings, meaning they have the same birth mother and different birth fathers. This shows the connection our families have are not just by love, but by blood. I love that. But we have a further connection. One of the greatest parts of Jeri is that she and my mom talk about Jesus and his grace. They hold each other accountable. Jeri is the greatest person for my mom. She loves visiting (she comes here once a year and my mom goes there once a year) and going fabric shopping, she loves making things, she is very funny. My mom and I are very close but going fabric shopping and making things are two things that I neither enjoy or do with my mom. I get bored and tired. My dad loves Jeri because he does not like doing those things either. He is so thankful that my mom has Jeri to do girly things with because if she didn't he would have to try and do them.

My point in telling you this is that I pray that one day I too will have a Jeri. I pray that when I grow up I will have someone who calls me and writes letters to me, someone who visits me and we do things together. I would say that my whole life I have not had someone like Jeri. Of course, when I was younger I had a best friend, in middle school I had someone that was like a best friend. But, I've never had a Jeri. I've never had someone who would hold me accountable and worship Jesus with me. Who would love doing the things I loved doing. I pray that someday I will have a Jeri.

Please don't misunderstand me. This is not a pity party. I do not want you to feel bad that I don't have a Jeri. I want you to pray with me that you too will one day have someone who cares that deeply for you. I know many of us will one day have spouses, but men and women are different and just as much as we need our spouses to be our best friends we need a best friend of the same gender. Pray with me that God will one day, sooner or later, give you a Jeri. Also pray that I won't idolize this best friend because Jesus is a better friend then anyone on earth could be. He sees all my crap and he still loves me. Human friends see my crap and get annoyed and have to work harder to love me. Jesus, what a friend to sinners.

In the name of the only one who can fill my need for a best friend,
Greta

Pain, loneliness, family, conversations, death - all for His Name

Since my last blog, which was way too long ago many things have happened to me. I won't bore you, but I will breeze over a few that the Lord has used to work for his glory.

1) I had shoulder surgery. The surgery went well. I'm feeling good and getting better. The hardest part is not the pain. The hardest part is not being able to drive. The Lord is teaching me that it is okay to be at home. I get to read a whole lot more and I reflect on what I read. That is a grace of God because I'm not a great reader or reflector and now I have hours to do it. Another hard part about not driving is not seeing my friends. The Lord has used this to show me that too often I make my friends my god. This is so hard. I'm a people person and knowing that I've gone too far is a hard reality. God is showing me my sins and giving me new joy in things. PRAISE GOD!

2) Many of my friends went on missions trips. The prayer requests I've heard and read amaze me because they are so Christ centered gospel spreading. They have convicted me of my need to be bold. As my friends have been gone prayer has been the one thing that has kept them going. How awesome is that? Super awesome!

3) My big sister came home. My sister goes to school in Greenville SC and has only been home for about 6 weeks out of the last two years. It is such a blessing to have her home. She is home for a week. It is amazing to hear what the Lord has done in her life in her evangelism training at Leadership Project with Campus Outreach. Again the Lord convicts me of my need to be bold.

4) I have had many conversations with friends that didn't go on missions trips and I'm amazed my the maturity of their hearts. When I am with people I love to ask two questions; 1) How's your life? 2) What is prayer worthy (besides everything) in your life? That way I can know really what is going on in their hearts. I love doing this because each time I praise God for the work he is doing in each heart and the prayer requests that are given are so God honoring. Then when I go back and get feed back I see what the Lord has done in answering prayer. WHOA!

5) My grandpa died. He is the first of any of my grandparents to die. He was almost 91 years old and he was declining quickly. The death wasn't a surprise and it wasn't too painful. The painful part was knowing that he probably died an unbeliever. He didn't say anything in the last several weeks of his life and the Lord could have been doing a work in his life then. We pray that He was doing a work and we trust in His grace, but that is all we can do. The last couple years my mom has gone over to his apartment everyday and helped him eat and talked to him. She shared the gospel with him several times and oftentimes would just read the gospels to him. When she would pray or share sometimes he would grunt out of frustration of not understanding it. I remember my mom coming home one afternoon and saying that grandpa heard her talking about the gospel and he said, "I don't get it." And she just kept going over the gospel again and again. We just trust in what the Lord was doing. If He called him we will worship the Lord together someday. This is by far the experience the Lord has used the most. The night before his death my family went over to his apartment, had a picnic on his floor, and had family devotions. My dad talked about how our lives are a breath. And we listened to my grandpa breathe with great struggle. We prayed that grandpa had Jesus Christ as his savior. We thanked God for what a great dad and grandpa he was. And we mourned that he would be gone. It was an awesome experience to see my family in tears for a lost person and possibly a lost soul. I will not soon forget that. Coming out of that experience God further convicted me that I need to share the gospel now because a life goes fast and a life might go by without hearing the gospel.

I ask you to pray that my family will be able to tell my aunts and uncles the truth of the gospel. I ask that you pray I get better at sharing the gospel. I ask you to pray for yourself and those you love because you will see your prayers answered and it is awesome. God uses big stuff and little stuff to convict us of sin. I praise God for that.

Psalm 24:5
He will receive blessing from the LORD
and righteousness from the God of his
salvation

God promises to bless us and to give us righteousness and salvation. That is great when it comes to sharing the gospel.

Sharing along with you,
Greta

Slip for Joy in the King

This is another extremely long post, I apologize. If you want to just skip to the last couple paragraphs you will get what I actually want you to get.

In fall 2007 I was pursuing my third year of high school basketball. I had so enjoyed the winning seasons of 9th and 10th grade that I couldn't wait to see how good we were going to be. Even though I loved the game I didn't heavily practice and just hoped I would do well. That was my first problem. My second problem was I was dry in The Word. God saw that the desires of my heart were to impress my basketball teammates and not to draw closer to Him. It was in His plan that my heart would change.

It was getting closer to basketball beginning and I couldn't wait for the season to start, so that I could get on the court with the girls and start having fun. The practice I had done had been fruitful, but I had consistently hurt my left shoulder every time I played. My mom and I went to the doctor and I got X-Ray'd and MRI'd, but we didn't get a call for a month because my appointment was so far out. One week before the season started we had a team meeting. It was so exciting to be sitting with the team getting ready for the future season. The next day was my appointment. Mom and I walked in with smiling faces because both of us and my dad were sure that nothing was wrong, it was common to have your shoulder slip. When we were finally greeted by the orthopedic doctor we were both excited to leave. He started to talk about how if he had a daughter with my shoulder he would do something about it because the cartilage had been torn and I could risk worse injury. Tears started to run down my face because all my confidence disappeared. My mom looked at me with a disappointed face. The orthopedic doctor took us out to look at the MRI to help us understand what was going on. All that I saw was a blurry computer screen. As soon as he was done I turned around and started to walk quickly out of the office. My mom grabbed my shoulder and started to cry with me. She loved that I played and she loved to watch. Every plan had changed, I didn't know what to think.

We went out to eat because I needed time to process before I went back to school. We prayed because that was all we could do. We couldn't change the injury, but God had a plan. When I got to school I didn't tell anyone until one of my teammates said to me, "How was the doctor?" Right in the middle of the hallway I began to cry. I couldn't say anything I just cried. They knew why I was crying.

We got to the surgery date and I missed Thanksgiving and the whole basketball season, but the plan God had was so much better than basketball. First, he should me some deep-seeded sin. I was angry at God for putting me through this because it was going to be my best basketball season. I had never felt that angry. I would wake up out of anger because this plan was stupid. I was prideful because I thought I was the bomb. I thought I had better plans than God did. When God showed me these sins the Cross of Christ became so precious to me. Second, He gave me the opportunity to serve Junior-High students, who I love deeply. Third, He drew me closer to Himself. Fourth, He gave me friends who love Him to show me my sin and to love me. As I look back at the past year and all that I've gone through I praise God for what he did. He showed me sin that I was holding on to and by God's grace I'm working to get rid of.

This summer I planned on going to four different camps where I would work with Junior-High and Senior-High kids. At the end of May it had been settled, but God had a different plan. A couple weeks before school let out I was playing Spring basketball with my team and at the end of our last game for the night my right shoulder slipped and I was in the worst pain of my life. I drove home and I laid on my bed writhing in pain. A couple days later I got an MRI and after that found out that I needed surgery on my shoulder. I would need surgery quick so that I could write once school began. We scheduled the surgery for July 16th. Again my summer vacation was ruined. I was only able to go to one camp because the rest of them are after next week. God used this second surgery to reveal my sin again.

One night I woke up really angry. I couldn't sleep because I couldn't understand why God would put me through this again. Didn't I learn my lesson the first time? I opened up a book and the chapter I was on was about suffering. God used that chapter to humble me because Christ suffered way more greatly than I am, but my pride was saying that this suffering was way worse. He used the chapter to reveal to me that all my sin was on the cross.

God is faithful. God has so much better plans than you do. When the plans change don't get angry. Praise God for the plans he has for you because they are, "for wholeness and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope" (Jeremiah 29:11). They are so much better than your plans. And, "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness" (James 1:2-3). The trials make you sharper and draw you closer to Him. In verse 4 of Psalm 24 the one "who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to what is false and does not swear deceitfully," will stand in the Holy Place of the Lord. Jesus died so that you can do that. If you sin find hope in the cross, if plans change find hope in the cross.

Following God's plans (Lord-willing),
Greta

You've heard the line about how when we were in kindergarten we would approach another child and say, "Hey I'm ______. Will you be my friend?" Most often that other person would accept you with open arms. Well, I question why we don't still do that. Is it because of my sinful nature that I'm more afraid to go up to someone and introduce myself and then be their friend? The sin being fearing man and not God. Why must another person always introduce me? I truly believe it is because of the fear of what that other person might think. Here's another good question, why is it so much easier to have a friend on facebook? I think it is because we don't have to worry about keeping in touch as much. We can write on their wall and all will be well. I love facebook, I can't lie, but what if it does keep me from real contact, maybe I should work on that. My rant is over, but I have a story that makes me sad.

I do not like high school. The pettiness of so many students bothers me. The lack of depth in each conversation discourages me. In elementary school I didn't think that way. I played tag and I watched cartoons with my friends and that was just fine. In middle school I didn't think that way. I played sports and watched sitcoms with my friends. I was involved in sports and student council, all the office staff knew me because I would just go down there to hang out. Then in seventh grade I was given a friend it was the best feeling ever. She was funny and did silly things with me. I was at the top of my game. But, at the beginning of each year I felt so alone because my friend and I would go through rocky patches. Now, as I look back I understand that the Holy Spirit was calling me to Himself, but I wasn't running to Him for friendship. Their was an emptiness. When I finally hit high school I was not excited. I had loved knowing everyone, and being involved in everything in middle school. Now I was going to be the little guy and no one would know me. I knew that middle school was the best three years of my life so how could high school measure up. I was right. High school didn't compare to middle school. In 9th grade I played tennis and I was the starting point guard for the 10th grade basketball team, I was on student council, and my older sister and I became great friends. But, finally I heard the Lord calling me and I began to run to Him. Suddenly all of the stuff that I had loved seemed pretty worthless. Still at the beginning of 9th, 10th, and 11th grade I felt an empty friendship. This time not from the Lord, but from friends. I wouldn't be invited to things because my friend was not assertive enough to say, "hey, let's call Greta." By the time I hit 11th grade I was headed down a different path from my friend. I was so confused because in middle school I couldn't stand being apart from her, but then, all of a sudden, being with her was work. This friend who I was working so hard to love was not giving any effort back and in fact was hurting me. I couldn't be myself around her and that was difficult. I continued to share a locker and walk with her in the hallways because I didn't have anyone else and she needed me to walk with her. At the end of the year I signed her yearbook and she signed mine. I haven't talked to her in a many weeks. I don't want to because of all the pain that relationship caused.

My point is, to be a good friend you have to work at it. And the effort doesn't come on facebook it comes when you give them a call and tell them you're listening. Then you pray for them. Don't think that if you facebook them they will feel totally loved. They will feel totally loved when you get on your knees and pray with them. Give some effort. That love is Christ's love. He died for our sins. Now he is interceding for believers at the Father's right hand. He is praying for us. What an awesome friend! Be like Christ, be a good friend.

Verse 3 of Psalm 24 says, "Who shall ascend the hill of the LORD? And who shall stand in his holy place?" I don't know if I have this quite right, but Jesus stands in the holy place and ascends the hill for us because He loves us. Whoa!

Christ heals from painful relationships. He fills that hole better then anyone else.

Working to love like Christ,
Greta

Family, Family, Family

I just spent the last 5 days at my Grandparents cabin. It was so great. The 4th of July is a favorite holiday in our family because we have at least 20 people stay at the cabin for a few days and all we do is play all day. It was a great weekend.
These pictures are actually from a few years ago and there missing some people, but this is mostly who was there.


This weekend made me thank God for my family because they all love the Word of God and show it in their actions. That is such a blessing. When we're at the cabin for the 4th my dad does cabin church. This year he preached on 1 John and 1 Corinthians 6. He showed us that 1 John shows believers how to know they are saved and 1 Corinthians 6 is one of the ways to know. It was such a blessing. It made some of us cry. I praise God for my family. In the second verse of Psalm 24 it says that God founded the seas and established the rivers. How awesome is it that the same God who did all that blessed us with friends and family to encourage one another? Praise Him for that mercy!

In Christ,
Greta