Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Wrestling with Worship


I really like Bethel.

Going into this year I said to myself that I'd keep my mind open to going to a different school next year. I am not doing a very good job. I really want to stay at Bethel because I am loving the life. I'm loving what God is doing in me and what He has provided for me. But I don't want to get so comfortable that I am not open to going somewhere else.

Reasons not to apply other places...
1/ I am already accepted to Bethel
2/ I like it here
3/ It's close to home
4/ I would miss it if I went somewhere else
5/ WyldLife
6/ Campus Outreach
7/ Friends from church
8/ Friends from school

Reasons to apply other places...
1/ It's close to home
2/ New experiences
3/ See if I can go anywhere else

Oh boy, so many decisions for a young person. I think I'm beginning to understand what my senior friends were going through this last spring.

We were singing in chapel recently and something hit me. Then I was listening to a Mark Driscoll sermon and it hit me again. We were singing about surrendering all I have to Jesus Christ. I kept thinking about that and wondered what it would look like in regards to school. Then I listened to Mark Driscoll talk about how worship isn't just singing, it's giving all thoughts, actions, and things over to Christ. He said that when people have problems they aren't drinking, swearing, eating, sex, etc. problems they are worship problems. We are putting something ahead of Jesus Christ and worshiping that thing rather than Christ. I'm praying that I can surrender myself over to Christ in a new way so that I'm not worshiping Bethel.

Do I wanna stay at Bethel because I've made it my God and it's what I want?

Yes, I think so. I need to surrender my desires and needs to God to see where He will have me.

Surrendering all,
Greta

1 comment:

Gabby Huerta said...

1. I'm glad that Bethel is such a good fit for you!

2. In the end, you will do whatever God wants you to, and go where ever He decides you will go.

I understand the conflict of feeling like it's an idol, I have many things in my life like that. But the very fact that God is bringing it to your attention is a sign that He is working in your heart. Also, God doesn't give us desires aimlessly-- He doesn't do anything aimlessly! And underneath your fear of idolizing Bethel, you still feel like this is an environment where you can thrive. Our Father in heaven joys in bestowing BLESSINGS on His children. But I know you know that and I know what you mean....

I love you and am praying for you...
gabs